Accountability

With all the newly suggested internet policies, Brown the Brave said that “we are ushering in a new world of accountability in which parents, patients and local communities shape services”. But what about Governments Mr. Brown? When will they be held accountable for anything?

What about your government?

Not another policy!

Gordon the Magnificent continues with his infinite list of new unrelated ideas. The latest is to half-train failed bankers to become half competent teachers. In other words, bankers who failed at their jobs, will get an accelerated course to become teachers.

As a full time teaching course seems not to be doing much good for the UK education system, why not do away with teacher training altogether, can't anyone with a stick become a teacher. 

Alternatively, we may also want to encourage early-released prisoners (one of Gordon the Magnificent latest policies) to take teaching jobs. After all, these guys sure know about life.

By the way, does anyone know what happened to the elimination of prostitution policy?

Trust the government

Prisoners released early from jail have been paid in compensation for losing free board and lodging.

This is the latest of the government policy kitchen. I have a few suggestions:

1. Why don’t we cancel jails altogether? Instead, we will have our courts pay criminals for the time they do not spend in jail?

2. Even better, why don’t we cancel the judicial system, and have the police (now wearing new red uniform with big white beard) hand cash directly to criminals: cash for not being sent to jail, and the profit from eliminating the court system.

3. This can be followed by cancelling the police as well. Instead, we can put money boxes in the street; boxes which only criminals would be allowed to take money from. We will make it illegal for non-criminals will never touch the money. So if they do, they would be breaking the law, and hence entitled to it.

Legal Matters

The life of a girl of 15 working as a prostitute was exposed when a suspicious teacher, who searched her bag, found condoms and the name card of her agency and alerted police.

Two legal issues are yet to be resolved before any act can take place:

1. Should the crown sue the teacher for abusing her power and conducting an unauthorized search?
2. Can help services ‘rescue’ the girl, as evidence was obtained illegally, and therefore, by law inadmissible.

There is nothing like a good bureaucracy to raise ones confidence in the system.

Bribes

Rail chiefs are in line for £600,000 bonuses, despite the continuously deteriorating service. I am glad to see that the reward for failure tradition continues. I also applaud the sensitivity of our leaders to the current market condition. After all, merely a year ago bonuses for failure were much higher.

Lock them behind bars

A mother who let her child continuously play truant was jailed for 56 days. This is a great use of our jail system, considering the number of dangerous criminals released early for lack of jail space.

I just wonder when was the last time anyone thought why we have jails at all, and who should be put there?

 

Drug enlightened UK by ranfuchs @ 18/02/2009 – 07:19:45

A father of three, whose family had been suffering from heroin dealers, has been jailed for two months for grabbing dealer’s heroin stash and flushing it down the toilet.

How enlightened UK has become. We have now entered a new human-right era in which heroin dealers seek police help to protect their possessions. Next, they will sue the police when it fails to protect them.

Coming soon: tax-payer's funds will be used to establish help-line for heroin dealers in financial distress.